I’m not anti-social; I’m just not user friendly.

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

Roses are #FF0000, Violets are #0000FF, All my base belongs to you.

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

The beginning of the programmer’s wisdom is understanding the difference between getting program to run and having a runnable program.

Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

The truth is out there… anybody got the URL?

Computers can never replace human stupidity.

Bugs come in through open Windows.

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

Hey! It compiles! Ship it!

I’m sorry, our software is perfect. The problem must be you.

Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.

Computer: A device designed to speed and automate errors.

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? – None. It’s a hardware problem.

source : http://www.yet-another-geek.org/pages/geekiness.html